10 questions to ask before dating

If you suddenly run out of things to say to her, you need to have a list of for hours. BTW If you are looking for great questions to ask your girlfriend, check out this ultimate post here: 90+ Really Good Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend Luckily, I am going to share with you a selection of the best things to ask and what to talk about with a girl. Many of my patients have asked me when it is appropriate for them to find out crucial information about someone they are thinking of continuing to date.They want to know early on if they should invest the time and energy that a quality relationship requires.

Their next obvious concern is the kinds of questions they should want answered.

There are many things you could ask that would gain you the information you need, but there are ten potent and successful data gathering questions that successfully begin the process of really knowing who someone is.

Because they are deeply intimate inquiries, it is also important that you approach your potential partner from authentic curiosity and a love of mutual exploration.

Do you ever have a hard time accepting No when you want something? i.e., they think others are attacking them when in fact they are not. Do you ever have a sense of being a failure as a person? Rationale: Does the person have emotional self-awareness?

Rationale: Is s/he entitled, disrespectful or needy? If you weren’t doing the job you’re doing now, what would you like to do? Rationale: Is s/he erratic, dysregulated or impulsive-in-a-bad-way? Do you feel confident about your ability to solve everyday problems that come up? Without emotional self-awareness, people can’t easily communicate when they need caring, and that tends to cause problems in relationships. To make an awesome relationship even better, these are great resources for giving your relationship a tune-up.

Rationale: Does s/he have any big plans for dramatic life changes you don’t know about? Rationale: Is the person excessively dependent, needy, or incompetent, or does s/he perceive themselves that way? Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner’s Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert ACT with Love: Stop Struggling, Reconcile Differences, and Strengthen Your Relationship with Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Note: Of course there are other important dating questions related to finances, children etc but I wanted to make a list of psychology-related dating questions.

Rationale: Does s/he have grit (which is important for success)? Is s/he going to be good at repairing your bond after you’ve had an argument? Do you know when you’re feeling hurt, lonely, sad, ashamed/embarrassed etc?

If someone was securely attached to their primary caregiver, they’re more likely to have a secure attachment style now (i.e., they’re not too needy or too distant). What are some examples of when you’ve persisted and succeeded at a long term goal? Is your pot smoking/binge drinking just a being young thing for you or can you imagine wanting to do it your whole life? Rationale: When you fight, is s/he going to fight nice?

Rationale: Attachment style shows a degree of continuity from childhood to adulthood. Are you able to admit when you’ve made a mistake or when your own actions might’ve contributed to a problem?

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