Cathy Bueti, a new cancer friend of mine (we met in person for the first time at the OMG conference last night!) has just written a memoir Breastless in the City.Yup, it chronicles her experience with breast cancer, but it's about so much more than that.

A few years later she was diagnosed with breast cancer and endured a mastectomy, hard-core chemo, hair loss and major reconstructive surgeries. Well, despite all the horrors she has faced, all the grief she has survived, Cathy continued to pick herself up and put herself out there.

To As a young widow it was years before I felt up to throwing myself back into the dating scene. I began online dating two years before my cancer diagnosis.

And although I faced a mastectomy, reconstruction and chemo, dating was still part of my post-diagnosis plan. I wasn't sure how to handle it bald and boobless.

I struggled with low self-esteem and disclosure issues.

Before my treatment began I hid my cancer from guys I was dating.

I figured since I didn't yet look the part why fess up when I wasn't sure if there would be a second or even third date?

Then my hair started to fall out from chemo and I had a reconstructed boob without a headlight. Menopause from chemo made me feel like an old lady, no longer a sexy single girl.

I couldn't hide it anymore so I began telling my dates sooner rather than later. My dating escapades ranged from the guy who thought I would be easier to get in bed because I had cancer, to the nice guy who bowed out gracefully when I told him. That first night we IM'd I fessed up about my cancer. I had found someone who could see past all the scars and my bald head to the person I was.

I was scared of rejection, embarrassed by my bald head and scarred boob. The worst was the guy who patted himself on the back and let me know that I should be grateful he was dating "someone like me." Many times I wanted to throw in the towel. Just as I was finishing up with chemo I gave it one more try. Six months later we were engaged and May 31st we will celebrate our 6th anniversary. I wanted to hold on to the parts of my life that made sense.

I wanted to be hopeful that I could survive and even find love again.

I think that deciding to date during treatment is a personal choice.

Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating